6 Tips to Go Spearfishing More (and Keep Everyone Happy About It)
If you’re slightly sick of watching clean water, fish reports, and perfect tides slide by while you mow lawns or assemble IKEA furniture… this one’s for you.
Let’s face it — the hardest part about spearfishing isn’t holding your breath; it’s finding the time to actually get wet. Here are six tips that’ll help you go spearfishing more and keep your loved ones cheering you on for it.
1. Prioritise Like a Pro
What does a “good week” look like for you? Once a week? Twice a month? Figure that out first, then plan around it.
Put first things first — but remember, spearfishing will seldom come first unless you make it happen. Block out the time, get the life admin done, and treat spearfishing like the mental health appointment it truly is.
Because here’s the thing: your family gets the best version of you when you dive. You come home calmer, happier, sunburned-but-grateful, and with fresh seafood that makes you look like Poseidon with a filleting knife.
2. Eliminate or Delegate (AKA Outsource Your Chores)
Are you doing stuff that someone else could do, or worse — stuff that doesn’t need doing at all?
Mowing the lawn, cleaning the garage, helping your mate move house again — these things can wait. Or be paid for.
Ask yourself: what’s more important — $50 and some petrol money, or watching your sanity swim away with the tide?
If outsourcing a chore earns you a dive day, that’s not spending money — that’s investing in your mental health (and dinner).
3. Master the Art of the Sickie
“Work to live, don’t live to work.”
Whether you own the business or work for someone else, a mental health day spent spearfishing is a legitimate form of therapy. Saltwater > spreadsheets.
Here are Turbo’s timeless rules for chucking a sickie like a legend (and keeping your job):
Rule 1: Be responsible. Sickies are for perfect days only — the kind where the water’s clearer than a monk’s conscience and even the lineos are catching.
Rule 2: Check the weather early. Perfect days are group events. A synchronised sickie with the crew is poetry in motion — Sickie x Sickie x Sickie = Ice box full of fish.
Rule 3: Lay the groundwork. Start limping or clutching your back on Monday if Thursday’s looking mint. Your coworkers will help build your alibi for you.
Rule 4: Make the call early, sound crook, and hang up fast. Bonus points for voicemail.
Rule 5: Wear sunscreen. Turning up the next day with a “sickie tan” will give you away faster than a pelagic in 5m vis.
Rule 6: Stay in character. Don’t bring fish to work, don’t post your catch on Instagram, and remember — you were sick.
(Disclaimer: this advice may ruin your reputation and the Australian economy. Proceed like a grown-up.)
Turbo after pulling a poorly executed sickie
4. Schedule Dive Days Like a Wedding
Put it in your calendar. Tell your loved ones early, arrange childcare, and plan around it like it’s sacred.
If the weather’s rubbish, fine — go to work. But you’ve created the opportunity. That’s how you win long-term.
Bonus: when your partner sees how happy and generous you are after a dive, they’ll start asking you when your next one is. (Trust me on this.)
5. Focus and Earn It
Want guilt-free spearfishing days? Knock over your jobs like a machine.
Do the important stuff first. Write a list:
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“Must Do” → do it now.
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“Later” → after your next Mackerel.
When you’re focused and responsible on land, people notice. You go from “always diving” to “legend who totally deserves to dive.”
6. Create a Code Name
If you need stealth, use a cover name. “Meditative Retreat.” “Breathwork Workshop.” “Marine Mindfulness Training.”
Technically, you’re not lying — spearfishing is all of those things.
Only trusted allies need to know “the code.” Everyone else just sees a centred, ocean-balanced version of you who occasionally attends “holistic conferences.”
Conclusion: The Sea Rewards the Prepared (and the Considerate)
So there you have it — six ways to get in the water more often without blowing up your job, marriage, or mental health.
Remember: every time you go diving, your loved ones get the best version of you — happy, generous, and bearing fillets. That’s a win-win worth scheduling.
Now, over to you — what are your tricks for getting wet more often?
